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Dad, Win Without a Lawyer, written by Canadian family law pioneer Carey Linde, is the undisputed bible for self-represented parents serious about being actively involved in their child’s life. You wouldn’t want to perform your own heart surgery but you sure can do a good job – perhaps the best – speaking from your heart on behalf of your own children in a court of law. There is no person better at any fee. You are your own best advocate. Dad, Win Without a Lawyer will help you survive the legal process and assist you in becoming a more creative, purposeful, and compassionate parent. His revealing book is primarily aimed at fathers, but Carey’s work is useful for any parent – mother or father – who is being pushed out of their children’s lives by the other parent. Whether you have just separated from the mother of your children and the court process is ahead of you, or you are in the court process now, or this life-changing event is behind you, the key message of Dad, Win Without a Lawyer is the same: Every misfortune is an opportunity in disguise. Dad, Win Without a Lawyer takes the reader on a journey that will not only make you a stronger person in court but a stronger person in life and a better overall parent. Contained in the pages of this insightful manual are strategies, tactics, and tips from many decades litigating in the gauntlets of court, negotiating on courthouse steps, and mediating family disputes. But success in family court requires more than a clever legal strategy. It also requires a healthy body and mind. Good parents are mentally stable and present themselves as such in court. Without emotional stability and your eye on the correct ball, the court biases against fathers and the maneuvers of opposing lawyers can keep you from your children. It’s absolutely critical you bring your very best game to court. Key to being at the top of your game is emotional stability, conviction of purpose, positive energy, and a respect for the role of the mother in your child’s life. When you walk into the courtroom, it must be with a mental attitude imbued with self-knowledge, enabling you to put aside the pain, losses and failures so that you can become the father your child needs. Like Zen and the Art of Motorcycle Maintenance, Carey Linde' s inspiring book speaks to a great deal more than its title suggests, to more than people with only legal problems. It is a primer for any person with the will to rise up out of the shadows of despair however caused to higher self-awareness.
- Sales Rank: #1758216 in Books
- Published on: 2016-12-12
- Original language: English
- Dimensions: 9.00" h x .73" w x 6.00" l,
- Binding: Paperback
- 322 pages
Most helpful customer reviews
1 of 1 people found the following review helpful.
Wish I had this book years ago
By Nash
I wish I had found this book years ago when I was going through a family law case. First of all, it's rare to find a lawyer willing to share their body of knowledge and personal thoughts on judges and courts so candidly (for example, the author firmly believes that gender bias is alive and well in our courts even in 2017, and he's right). It’s rarer still to find a lawyer who thinks that, when it comes to speaking from the heart about your children, no lawyer can do as good a job as you can. That’s an awesome message that I didn’t realize until now.
This book has basically 2 major themes: Your own psychological health and wellbeing, and the law/courts. The basic premise is that getting divorced takes a steep psychological toll that you must deal with if you're to do well in court. Both are necessary for success, the author says.
I can tell you from experience that while having a lawyer for certain areas is very much needed -- and the author says so with regard to issues like engaging experts and starting an initial court action, or conducting an examination for discovery/deposition -- but not having a lawyer and representing yourself has advantages, too. For example, a judge will hold lawyers to a very high bar, but if you're self-represented, judges will often grant you a lot of leeway, and permit you do to things that a lawyer might not get away with.
I was especially surprised by the chapter on the "Elephant in the Courtroom", which deals with gender biases in the court. Surprised, that is, to hear a lawyer say it out loud. This section is 100% accurate. And the author's advice about playing by the rules and conforming to what a judge is looking for is bang-on correct. While the author, Carey, is based in Canada, the book is still very worthy for parents in the U.S., UK or elsewhere, as the author doesn’t get into a detailed analysis of specific legislation, but instead focuses on themes you’ll encounter in any courtroom. The author has apparently been a family lawyer for almost 40 years, and I think his experience shows here.
Considering the super high cost of lawyers and getting divorced, this book is worth its weight in gold. A great read.
0 of 0 people found the following review helpful.
A Perfect Companion for a Man in a Sad Situation
By Nate
The process of separating from a wife is hard enough in and of itself. If there are children from this marriage, guarding their interests is harder still. To then navigate the layer of doubt, conflict and confusion that courts, judges and lawyers superimpose can make it near impossible.
Carey Linde’s approach is to help untangle the personal pain and the practical steps of divorce, both of which are inevitable. It is necessary to work through the pain in order to rationally approach the process. Through all this, he forces you to keep perspective on who is most important: your children.
If you are looking to reinforce ill feelings about your ex-partner, and galvanize your effort to win victoriously in court over the custody of your children, this is NOT your book.
But, if you are a father who just wants to make sure your relationship with your kids is not compromised by divorce from their mother, this IS your book.
Mr. Linde takes a nuanced approach to helping men walk the line of healing from one of the most painful things he can go through and preparing to defend his right to be a central part of his kid’s lives; not instead of, but along with, his ex-wife.
0 of 0 people found the following review helpful.
Great book
By Harpreet Lehal
A great book with great advice from the "best" family lawyer in Vancouver.
If you want an advantage read it.
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